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Get Out Of Control |
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If you are struggling in life and you feel like things are out
of control then maybe you need to get “out of control”.
What does this paradoxical statement mean?
Think about how you approach living. Are you trying on your
own power to deal with all the complexities and challenges that
come your way? You can make all the plans you want, set down
your goals, work your plan and still end up frustrated.
The problem is that we try to run things ourselves. Of course,
each of us is responsible for our own actions. You cannot get
away from that fact. That doesn’t make you responsible
for the outcome.
A wise statement I read somewhere says something to the effect
that it’s not what happens to us in life that matters
it is how we respond to what happens.
Response is part of the word responsibility. This is different
from reaction. A physical law in the universe is that for every
action there is a reaction. Physics teaches that this is an
“opposite but equal reaction”. In the spiritual
realm this applies as well, except that it may not be an opposite
or equal reaction. However, what we do does affect what happens.
Here’s the mindbender. Sometimes what we don’t do
also has consequences.
Harmful addictions are running rampant in many lives. Drugs,
alcohol, gambling, sex…the list goes on and on. At the
core of this problem seems to be the desire by the self to control.
If we suffer from any of these addictions we often believe we
can control them. The denial is so strong that many of us fail
to perceive the addiction at all!
I present a new way of thinking. If you are out of control,
then “get out of control”.
There is only One who has all power
That One is God.
Since God has all power it makes sense that only God is in control.
Does this mean we lack any control at all? Let’s not oversimplify
this concept. What we often think of as control is really choice
in disguise. We all have free will, so we all have the ability
to choose. The painful penalty of life-threatening addictions
is that at some point we appear to lose the ability to choose.
We simply must drink or drug or act on our lusts. If this has
happened to you and you recognize it then great despair may
result.
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There is a solution
What if we just…let go? Can you bear to take your hand off
the rudder and stop trying to steer?
God is in control. This is true whether we like it or not. God
won’t stop us from making poor choices. He will always
enable us to bear the pain of our consequences when we do, as
long as we turn to Him for support.
First we must acknowledge our powerlessness and choose God to
be in charge. This can be a frightening beginning. There is
that real concern that if we stop steering we are going to crash.
The painful truth, of course, is that if we are steering with
a faulty guidance system (our flawed self-will) a crash is inevitable!
Getting out of control (i.e. out of the driver’s seat)
requires that we trust someone else to be in control. There’s
the problem so many of us run up against. I, for one, don’t
want other people to be in control of my life. I rebel at authority.
I know what I want and how I want it! I can be pretty defiant.
To let someone, or something, be in charge requires trust. Big
trust. Really big trust when it comes to the larger issues in
life. Placing your life in the care of God means you have faith
that God can do a better job directing your life than you can.
Not easy to admit.
What’s the alternative? If you are addicted to something
that will eventually kill you it is insanity to keep doing it.
Plain and simple. People don’t like to admit that. Still,
many continue on to the bitter end. Sometimes it takes a while
to reach that bitter end. Lots of pain, broken hearts, ill health,
destruction of homes, property and loss of jobs. It is not a
pretty picture.
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Bitter or Better
As we’ve already mentioned, there is a solution. We don’t
have to go to the bitter end. We can seek spiritual help. We
can get out of control—self control—and give our
lives over to God.
In the New Testament you will find that Jesus very often asked
people who came to him for help or healing what they wanted
him to do for them. I’m sure Jesus already knew what they
wanted. It’s another measure of his goodness that he gave
them the dignity of choosing to ask for help.
Compassion for others’ suffering and addictions is important.
When you care about someone’s pain and you are willing
to respect them despite their failings…their sin, if you
will…you give that person dignity. So often that is an
essential element to break down the defense and self-denial.
Everyday that we avail ourselves of the unlimited and unconditional
love of God we get infused with a Spirit that inevitably makes
us better. If we refuse the love we face the dead end of our
powerlessness. Without help you’ll probably get bitter.
Get Help
If you are suffering from the torment of unhealthy addiction then
get help. First, admit you are powerless to change on your own.
See how unmanageable life is. Then believe and trust in God
to see you through.
Don’t stop there. God is going to work in your life through
other people. Be realistic. Seek the therapy, the counseling,
the 12-step group or the fellowship that specializes in your
particular affliction. The solution is simple, but that’s
doesn’t mean it will be easy. Your pride will be leveled
and you’re going to have to take a hard look at your self
and your past actions. There will be some cleaning up of that
past wreckage, including taking responsibility and trying to
set things right.
Take heart, you can do it. None of us is unique. Neither are
we alone.
But, we must get out of our self-centeredness and quit trying
to run everything. We must simply get out of control.
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Scripture taken from the Holy Bible,
NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®.Copyright © 1973, 1978,
1984 International Bible Society. All rights reserved throughout
the world. Used by permission of International Bible Society.
NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION® and NIV® are registered trademarks
of International Bible Society. Use of either trademark for
the offering of goods or services requires the prior written
consent of International Bible Society.
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible,
New Living Translation, copyright ©1996. Used by permission
of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, IL 60189, USA. All
rights reserved.
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Recommended
Reading
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PSALM 25:16-18 |
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"Turn to me and have mercy on me,
for I am alone and in deep distress.
My problems go from bad to worse.
Oh, save me from them all!
Feel my pain and see my trouble.
Forgive all my sins."
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(NLT) |
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