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Going One-on-One |
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AN ARTICLE ON MENTORING
by Tom Gilbert
Why is it that the image of the strong, silent
and independent person has been presented as an admirable role model? This
rugged individualism has such strong connotations in Western society
that even as I write this, knowing in my heart of hearts the falseness this
stereotype conveys, there is a certain part of me attracted to it. Like the
moth that circles the fire, blissfully unaware of the danger of the heat
and only intrigued by the bright light I flutter closer and closer.
Eventually all loners get burned by the empty promises of doing it yourself. You
can’t get too far in life without the humility to ask for help. Getting to
that point is a good start, but actually seeking the best help, is crucial to long-term
growth.
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Passing it On
If you find good mentors in life you eventually discover
that wisdom passed on to you includes a responsibility
for you to pass it on, too. It is the ongoing chain that
connects us and keeps us flourishing.
Have you consciously entered into a mentoring relationship? Whether conscious or not
of how one person helps another in this intimate way, we all have probably been touched
by it. Guides, sponsors, teachers, spiritual directors or gurus; they have many names,
but the commonality is a relationship that invests and shares in your development. You
grow as you apply the lessons. The mentor, too, benefits, not just
from being the benefactor, but in continued growing and learning from the student. It is
the great economy of spirituality. In God’s world nothing is wasted.
Free your mind from the impression of a mentor as only a business or academic guru. True
mentors are interested completely in their protégés. The special relationship
means going beyond the surface and building a relationship that is specific, caring,
empathetic and challenging. Look at what the gospels tell us of Jesus and his disciples.
Jesus was often challenging, just as often encouraging.
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Held Accountable
One of the key aspects of mentoring is accountability. We
all come up with good ideas, insights, inspiration and motives. How do we see them
through? Someone to report our progress and our setbacks to helps immensely.
I was visiting www.mentoring-disciples.org as part of the research for this article and
I became fascinated at the discovery that a certain Cypriot named Joseph was an extremely
important mentor. Two of the people he mentored had a profound effect on the world and the
church. One was the author of the second gospel, John Mark; the other a writer of over
one third of the New Testament, the apostle Paul. Both were mentored by the same man. His
Greek name means “encourager”. Do you know who he was?
Barnabas was frequently mentioned in the Book of Acts and was
instrumental in the early church at Antioch, where the believers
were first called Christians ().
Several times he is mentioned in partnership with Paul in their
teaching and witnessing. His influence must have been profound
on both Mark and Paul. Yes, Barnabas is the Joseph of Cypriot.
One of the signs of a good mentor is the significant accomplishments
of
the
people
they
help. I imagine Barnabas also had a powerful mentor.
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It’s Not Too Late to Begin
If you’ve never been in a mentoring relationship it
is never too late. The typical image of mentoring is an older, wiser sage showing
the ropes to a young person. Nothing wrong with that – what a wonderful vision
that as many young people as possible be mentored by those who have real world
life experiences to pass on. But, anyone can benefit from being either the mentor
or the mentee.
Prayerfully consider if God is putting a call on your heart to get involved in mentoring.
Spend some time jotting down some of the things you’ve learned (or want to learn)
and consider how beneficial it would be to spend some quality one-on-one time with another.
You know the saying, “when the student is ready the teacher will appear”. I’m
sure that works the other way, too. Many a “teacher” should prepare themselves for
the extremely rewarding experience of passing on some encouragement, inspiration, knowledge
and true examples of real Christian living.
Other resources:
See the Living the Solution online store special section
on mentoring.
Also:
Mentoring – A Worldwide Christian Mentoring
Ministry
National
Mentoring Partnership Lots
of information on mentoring
Mentoring
Children of Prisoners Program —
Federal grants for mentoring
children of prisoners. In February 2004, FYSB released
its announcement of the availability of financial assistance
and request for applications for the fiscal year (FY) 2004
Mentoring Children of Prisoners Program. The deadline for
submitting applications is April 23, 2004.
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Scripture taken from the Holy Bible,
NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®.Copyright © 1973, 1978,
1984 International Bible Society. All rights reserved throughout
the world. Used by permission of International Bible Society.
NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION® and NIV® are registered trademarks
of International Bible Society. Use of either trademark for
the offering of goods or services requires the prior written
consent of International Bible Society.
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible,
New Living Translation, copyright ©1996. Used by permission
of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, IL 60189, USA. All
rights reserved.
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PSALM 23:3
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"he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake."
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(NIV)
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Recommended
Reading
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