| Review – Minding Your Emotions |
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by Steve Shores
Review by Tom Gilbert
Most of us have an opinion about emotions.
One person might consider them for weaklings, that emotional
people are insecure and unstable and less than reasonable.
Someone else states that you need to lighten up, smile
more, or get sensitive and cry more. You know, stop
being like Mr. Spock.
Feelings: we all have them, even if we try to deny them or stuff
them. You may be one of those reserved, stoic types.
Or, you might be more open with your feelings—even
wearing them “on your sleeve”.
Thinking about our emotions, and further, understanding how they
affect us, is tackled by Steve Shores in his new book,
Minding Your Emotions, (Navpress). The author is a writer
and licensed professional counselor. He beautifully
integrates Biblical teaching and interpretation in to
this book. It makes a lot of sense.
We really need to understand our feelings to nurture our
soul. Our spirituality is enriched when we understand
the nature and purposes of emotion. Certain key emotions,
when minded properly, will open us up to great insight.
Why is it that so many people are divided into either the
“hurray for emotions” camp or the “let’s
not have any of that here” side? The proper approach,
of course, is balance. The ability to integrate our
emotions by using our head together with our heart is
nothing new. However, our human natures are so often
off-track when it comes to emotions that we can always
benefit by venturing further in this area.
Shores utilizes the emotion cycle in explaining how we react
to situations. The stubborn truths ingrained in us often
war with our heart-desires. Together they influence
our beliefs, goals, choices, behaviors, focused emotions
and vague moods. They all act in concert, influencing
and motivating us.
What I feared when I picked up this book was a treatise of
psychobabble disguised as Christian counseling. Fortunately,
it’s not that at all. It’s tough to be honest,
especially with how we treat our emotions. Again, there’s
the risk of offending those who believe this subject
best left private, or the danger of alarming the “feeling
extremists”. It’s a delicate balance to
write about something that touches us all.
Shores accomplishes this by reminding us that we’re going
to frequently feel uncomfortable. As Christians we sometimes
feel alienated here--this world is not our true home.
It’s a temporary accommodation and part of our
rent is paid in spiritual growth. That growth necessitates
thinking about emotions, identifying what’s really
going on and allowing divine guidance to point us in
the right direction. Our emotions are necessary to our
self-understanding.
We all have longings to contribute and connect. In various
ways our feelings send us messages on how successful
we are at doing that. If we ignore our longings, or
deny them, they tend to emerge in often perverted forms.
This can result in damaged relationships and unhealthy
behaviors.
This book makes a crucial point, that the up and down emotions
all play a part. Often the so-called down emotions are
quicker to instruct us in areas that need attention.
Anger, therefore, becomes a warrior of the heart. Sadness
can help us discover what’s missing.
Other down emotions can point to unfulfilled longings. We
must not ignore or stuff our sorrow, anxiety or fear.
Just as important is keeping the up emotions of joy, excitement,
gladness and contentment in proper perspective.
A constantly growing relationship with God is vital to
our understanding of these feelings. Human-only interpretations
are hazardous. The Spirit’s clarification keeps
us on a path of progressive spiritual development.
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Scripture taken from the
Holy Bible, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®.Copyright ©
1973, 1978, 1984 International Bible Society. All rights
reserved throughout the world. Used by permission of International
Bible Society.
NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION® and NIV® are registered
trademarks of International Bible Society. Use of either
trademark for the offering of goods or services requires
the prior written consent of International Bible Society.
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy
Bible, New Living Translation, copyright ©1996. Used
by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton,
IL 60189, USA. All rights reserved.
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